Matahariku Je T'aime Maple Syrup Guy

Matahariku Je T'aime Maple Syrup Guy


Its been a month..
I cant sleep at times..
With whatever being displayed..
I really wanna cry at times..
Sometimes, he appear in my dream..
And i will wake up crying..
Calling out for his name..
Yes, i know he will never come back..
Even if he does..
I cant accept him..
Yes i still do love him..
But all i could say.. My life totally ruined by him..
I was left alone.. (READ AGAIN: ALONE!!)
Nobody to go to..
And i felt so sick and disgusted..
Accepting the blame alone..
Not even a helping hand from him, to share the burden..

Now all i wish, his hugs and a kiss on my forehead and lips..
I miss all that..
And his sweet smell that put me to sleep..
It lingers and make me felt as tho im in a wonderland..
Im typing this..But My eyes are closed..the memories in my mind, cant be deleted...
When i close my eyes, i could see him..
I try to grab him, but i cant..so close yet so far..
Im drowning in my own world now..
I cant find anybody to help me..

Reality Check: He's happy..(i will pray for his happiness wherever i am)
And he knows, i dont wish to see him..
Why?? Coz my life changed because of him...
And all i wanna do is to hate him, but its so hard..
All i want is to forget him, but the more i want to delete the memories..
The more it keeps coming back..
The more i wanna run away from him, the more my fingers will dial or type something on the msn..
The more i wanna hide, the more, i went to the places i spent my time with him..

I said i have moved on.. Yes.. But...He's one in a million..
Nobody can replace full moon..
nobody can replace him..
the 2 guys, i really love...

Even tho, my LG viewty wallpaper, is not our pic anymore..
But My n73 is still the pic of both of us..
the one that he said i look pretty.. and he put as his hp wallpaper 2.
i was blushing.. and i felt like kissing him that moment.. but i was shy..

Do you know.. For this one month, im running away from everybody..
Cause i dont want to see you.. It hurt..
Nobody can see, cause, im starting to live in denial..
I pretend and put a smiley mask on my face..
To hide the pain from everybody...
You never gave me a chance..

If god gave me a chance to turn back the time, i would go out and had breakfast with someone else and not meet him..
And somehow to fall for him, how stupid i was..
Haiz.. So much so, denying the feelings i had..
Its a real pain, and letting it out here,
My tears cant stop rolling down my cheeks..

God, please send me an angel to wipe these tears.
.The rest said he's not worth my tears, but why cant i stop crying..
Oh god.. Its been a month.. Please, let the feelings fade..
Im begging you for mercy and help..
Cause, when i was left alone, I only have you to share everything..
And only you know whats the best for me.. and you knew how i felt..
Please.. I just want to be be happy..


To: Je T'aime Maple Syrup Guy

Tertutup Sudah Pintu
Pintu Hatiku
Yang Pernah Dibuka Waktu Hanya Untukmu
Kini Kau Pergi Dari Hidupku
Kuharus Relakanmu
Walau Aku Tak Mau

Berjuta Warna Pelangi Di Dalam Hati
Sejenak Luluh Bergeming Menjauh Pergi
Tak Ada Lagi Cahaya Suci
Semua Nada Beranjak Aku Terdiam Sepi

Dengarlah Matahariku
Suara Tangisanku
Ku bersedih
Karna Panah Cinta Menusuk Jantungku
Ucapkan Matahariku
Puisi Tentang Hidupku
Tentangku Yang Tak Mampu
Menaklukkan Waktu


IF i had a chance, i will immune myself with antidote and not fall for you..
Cause the bullet proof vest didnt work..
And im hurt and bleeding..
HELP ME!!!