guys...i know u all care for me...i will be alrite soon..trust me...
farrah n him are a couple...n i gave my blessing to them...i have no hard feelings wif farrah...
so no worry alrite..between me and alif is over...is past...no present no future...
im not an angle or devil..im a human...if u wanna know my true feelings...im so sorry...i got to keep it to myself...no worry ok...

song bukan diriku means alot to me...

setelah kupahami
ku bukan yang terbaik
yang ada di hatimu

tak dapat kusangsikan
ternyata dirinyalah
yang mengerti kamu
bukanlah diriku

kini maafkanlah aku
bila ku menjadi bisu
kepada dirimu

bukan santunku terbungkam
hanya hatiku berbatas
tuk mengerti kamu
maafkanlah aku

walau kumasih mencintaimu
ku harus meninggalkanmu
ku harus melupakanmu
meski hatiku menyayangimu
nurani membutuhkanmu
ku harus merelakanmu

dan hanyalah dirimu
yang mampu memahamiku
yang dapat mengerti aku

ternyata dirinyalah
yang sanggup menyanjungmu
yang lama menyentuhmu
bukanlah diriku

thats how im feeling rite now, i miss him, i love him, but he not meant for me...haiz...

hey guys its me again.. i dunno wat i shud do rite now..

Happy birthday farrah!!!!

BTW SELAMAT HARI RAYA HAJI..
selamat hari raya korban..
korban means sacrifies rite..i guess i did sacrifies...hope god bless me...

i dunno where to start..
hmmm this couple of days aft i break up...farrah been spending time wif alif..its not wrong...im not mad at her...
hmmm we had heart to heart talk...wen she msg me at 3 plus saying i make up stories and all..but i didnt...its juz misunderstanding...same goes to the story abt Q n R...it was actually abt her...but i try to keep it low...i didnt ask her..coz i dun wanna hurt her or anything...and sometimes it may not be true...

and yesterday farrah ask me out alif is also there...
papa send me to tamp...
and aft we had heart to heart talk we went to pizza hut to find the guy tat wawa like...his name is khalee...mcm alie je...hahaha
walk ard...farrah keep saying yesterday they go out...but she said they didnt meet on friday..but ending yes its true...
and abt 1140 farrah msged me and said she like ismail alif...
my heart drops...
but i asked her to call me...she did...i told her to go on...
i control myself... i deleted alif no..
alif still wan me to be his fren...but i cant...
i still love him... 3 weeks i spend most of my time wif him...
i miss him so much wen im away...
i really do...
full moon help me alot...
farrah ask me if she and alif get together...will i leave her...i say no...i still love her as my adik.. i mean it...no hard feelings...
i dun wanna be selfish...i have to give them my blessing.. i dun wanna see farrah n him hurt becoz of my selfishness..

i hope tis is the last time i blog abt alif...i still got to delete the pics and sms and the recording we made...i mean voice..he sang a song...n i record it..

corinna in tis situation u got to keep it to urself...
yes... aft this i got to keep it to myself..
evn it hurt so much...

to farrah...no worry ok girl..im alrite...i juz wanna seee u happy ok....i will be alrite soon...hope so..
u will still be my best fren...

i just pray and wish that everyday would be a better day for me
but i dunno if the praying and wishing is good enough..
but i've tried my best..
sometimes i just wannna run away from my current life...and start a new life so i cud leave every pain that im going thru...

guess wat guys....
i got to know this cute guy name nizar...
and happen to be that nizar grandfather is my atuk best fren...wat a small world...hahahaha
serious...i didnt know till he told me...he ask abt my grandfather...i was like...wtf how u know where my grandpa stay and name...

hanis aka corinna is going crazy...tmr out wif farrah and souher again.....

me n him in the bus...
its over..love tis pic..

3 days aft my bday...i break up wif alif...yesterday...same like last year...3 days aft my bday i break up wif zul...
i dunno la wats goin on..
hmmmm....but i guess got to move on...haiz...this year been a hell of a year...
i go thru alot of ride...haiz
i cant face alif anymore..same like hafiz...
both in same sch...same course...hanis giler..
idk wat full moon thinking rite now...he know everything tat goin on in my life...

i been msging full moon wen i was in cameron and all...we talk and stuff..he told me stuff i dun wanna hear...but thats life...

WHAT HURT THE MOST, WAS BEING SO CLOSE, AND HAVING SO MUCH TO SAY AND WATCHING YOU WALK AWAY.. AND NEVER KNOWING WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN AND NOT SEEING THAT LOVING YOU IS WHAT I WAS TRYING TO DO..

ok start out like this..
full moon has the same hp as me..yes n73...mine white colour his silver..hahaha..menyebok
ok friday i had lots of fun!! real fun..clazz bbq..
i had a new fren in claz her name is shereen..
so add me farrah adk eqa n shereen..our claz real crazy..
we had lots of fun..esp me..disturb eqa and farrah..eqa wif isa...farrah wif her bf..nas..
hahahahaha...all tis is pure fun...im nuts...
love goin crazy...
had 2.4km run wen my claz chairman tried to throw water bomb at me..but once i start running...hahaha to bad...he cant catch me...i still wonder how can i run tat fast..serious..east coast da lah hujan lebat..basah some more, i run without my slippers...
i dunno...i ended the nite wif smile coz i decided to forget abt hafiz n go wif this guy name ismail alif..

hmmm saturday went out wif farrah n eqa n isa..finally had wat i been craving for years...chicken rice shop...hahahaha
i saw my crush..
he so fucking hot...cair gue..no regrets goin vivo evn tho im not feeling well..i saw him...oh god..but wif a girl..alamak spoil..
nvm...
aft vivo...farrah n i walk from douby ghout to paragon....to meet souher and her bf...redza...hahaha...left afiq to meet redza...afiq (souher best fren)

sunday morning..early morning at 6 that ismail alif sound me...oh my..i msg eqa farrah n adk..
they tell me to give alif the chance to make me happy...
i say yes!!

went out wif him to vivo...
wen we wanna go home...he was hugging me... guess who i saw!!! yes yes yes, i saw hafiz..he stare and gave me that look like telling me no.. dont go wif that guy... i still love u...
i smile and say hi...he juz stare at me and dun wanna me to go...
i felt i still have feeling for him.. oh god..help me...
i msg eqa adk n farrah...they like, u dun mcm2 give alif a chance will u..
ok...
now all i need is a short break..yes im goin holiday...tmr...yeah yeah... gonna miss u guys!! muackz..
i need to be strong... once im back i will give u guys the answer to who my heart belongs...

i want r2d2 for my bday. yes i saw it at toys r us...best ah..its a robot can follow u anywhere..and can take care of ur room wen u away. i wish if i hav tat i can bring it to school. alif was like..wat?? u giler la...hahahaha

i miss full moon..like duh...i chatted wif full moon..
hahaha...crazy ppl on the loose...
i n farrah also go crazy...abt our presentation..worst..
hahahaha
i msg her tra la la ding dong for nothing..
tmr i n farrah hav to go on stage!! wtf
idk la who gonna faint wat ever is...now our sch like ghost town...
wen we wanna hav lunch we always say..alah boring ah...cafe semua empty..
all cute guys go for holidays..
really...
my cafe 2 guy also missing..damn..hahaha..
my beego also graduate..sobs...
trust me my sch like got a lot of cute guys...so we r like hmmm thats mine..hahaha
ok i know alif love me alot..he cried coz he really love me... i mean of coz he gonna cry...
n im trying to love him whole heartedly...
god help me...
get over hafiz...i still havent delete the pics...damn rite..
i know alif reading this blog 2...dear.. i love you 2..but give me time ok..so i will not hurt anybody including u..
all i need is time...i love u..

been few days of fucking sucking days...well luckily i have somebody to let out evrythin in my heart..
well..i felt like my frenship wif my fren juz a waste of time aft knowing how my fren react...
let call my fren R..
ppl told me R been bitching abt me all ard..Q told me la how R act wen i talk and all..she do faces..
come on i been wif R for almost 2years..been beside R thru the worst problem of R life...R juz dont get it..i love R like my own Blood..
alot tell me to ignore R
how? confuse..

i dun wanna carry on..it juz suck to know and even sucks to go thru this..

im listening to songs drama love relationship and last night..
fuh..
i miss him badly..

on thursday..he was juz there standing less than 10 meters away from me..but yet he so far from me, i wanna hug him so badly..i cried in front of him..wanting him to hug me and all..i even msg him but he read the msg and delete it..i dont deserve this way..

friday..chill wif fadily and farrah..
hakim ask me, im not waiting or meeting hafiz..i was wat..he didnt wanna say hi to me..now story i wanna meet or wait for him..yes i love him..but since when aft we break up there no such thing anymore..haiz..he run wen he saw me in cafe 2..why...
go home my sis call she wanna go out wif me to bugis coz she need to get perfume and all..
all the way in bus 100 got this couple..lesbian to be exact..they make out and all..damn..i freaking out..

i mean why hafiz do all this to me??

saturday.. i n my forever partner in crime...plan to do some shopping and meeting a guy at marina..guess wat!!! yes wen we wanna stop at city hall, hafiz and gang wanna boad the train...n like no other door in the whole mrt..he must go in thru the door im goin out..wtf..idk why god really wanna test me till like this...farrah guess they goin to vivo..wat ever is i called wawa, if wawa wanna smack down him la..hahaha...

sunday pure nothing...bored..hahaha..
hope my makcik is recovering soon coz she met an accident on sunday morning..

today...i saw him again!!! argh!! it kills me...

farrah i want candy cane!!

haiz..i can get everything i wan..thats wat full moon told me...but why i cant get him...
i mean i never ask him for money or anything..all i wan is him and his love..
i sound so so bitch but thats the fact..he cant say anything..he blame me..why must he blame me when i try so hard to save and make the relationship work perfectly...

yes i admit i like fadily...but i still love hafiz.. and i throwing away my feelings for fadily... i mean i still love hafiz..so i cant anyhow like fadily...it hurt meet me more..
worst when he act so sombong when my friend smile at him.. i mean..his frens i do make an effort to smile say hi bye or something..i didnt like watever..
it hurt me badly listening to what ppl said about him..damn..

Last night you were so into it
You told me secrets that
You've never told a soul
You were so nervous and yet oh so comfortable
As we explored your image of love
I drank your wine
As you taste mineI
kissed your lips
You felt my body slip
Into your soul
I almost cried 'cause it was so beautiful

Last night
I was inside of you
Last night
While making love to you
I saw the sun , the moon
The mountains and the rivers
I saw heaven when I made sweet love to you